Friday, May 13, 2011


Before I even start--let me give you a run down of the evening:

6:30   Leave my friends at the restaurant, early, because Baby Monster, (AKA Ava's alter ego) showed up. I suppose I shouldn't call her that--her body has decided to "teethe" early. So really, "Teething Monster" showed up. 
6:45   Start "Baby Spa Time" early. Again--it worked like a charm. Soothed a level of screaming that I don't care to describe.  Unfortunately I had to take Ava out of the tub of bliss eventually.
7:30   Ava is down to sleep.
7:32    Nope..she's up.
8:00    Finally Ava really had arrived at Sleepy Town.  
8:01    I head to the kitchen. There are dishes in the dishwasher waiting for me. Surprise! The dishwasher has not even run! And the lights are blinking! I go fish the manual out of the office, and begin the DIY dishwasher repair--which mainly consisted of me pushing the stove, sink, and dishwasher out from the wall, and pulling on all the hoses. And simply turning the dishwasher on and off, on and off.  
8:30   Fixed. "That was easy!"
8:31   I decide to try on my dress for Steven's homecoming. It's adorable. However, I couldn't unzip the zipper. So with my super human mom strength, I manage to pull (more like rip) the zipper down. I thought, "Hey--maybe it was just a little stuck?" and put the dress on; only I could no longer zip the dress---because I broke the zipper.  

8:32  I move to the kitchen for a the mending kit, "Maybe I can fix this," (yeah right!) when I notice the lights blinking on the dishwasher again..."What?" So back to the pulling and pushing. Too hungry to continue. Too tired to cook anything. 

8: 33  So here I am. Sitting at the kitchen table in my broken dress, eating cold spaghetti, (because my euro microwave takes a million minutes to heat) listening to a dishwasher on the fritz. Lamenting the laundry I need to do....but I can't do laundry because there is a spider in the laundry room. 

       I know there is a spider in the laundry room because last night I saw him, and last night I fainted because I saw him. FAINTED! Because of a spider! Many of you may know my fear of spiders, but I have never been so afraid as to faint, (I'm not a cartoon character). I can only attribute this reaction to a combination of being startled, scared, and supremely tired. According to the clock I was only out for a few seconds. All I can remember is turning on the light, seeing the large, toddler-sized spider, and then waking up on the floor.  I know he's still down there waiting for me.....

waiting...the way spiders do.

 (FAQ) "But Blayne? Why didn't you just step on him?" That is the dumbest question ever. First of all,  he was on the wall. I wasn't going to attempt to round-house-kick-him to the face. Second of all, what if I missed? He'd just be angry and tell all of his friends. Third, I think he already IS angry. I think he's the same spider I trapped inside of box a few weeks ago, (only he's gotten bigger). 

All of this rambling to say: JUST A FEW MORE WEEKS! Steven will be home this month!

This mess of an evening, and the spider-event that ensued last night, had me realize just how much I miss Steven being here. For a lot of the obvious reasons, but also for the little stuff. Not just to kill spiders, but to give hugs, and kisses. To go on walks with. To watch movies with. To laugh with.To eat dinner with. To wake up next to. To talk to. I miss my best friend, and my husband.

(And I also miss having someone else around to eat the food. When all the ice cream is gone, I can't say--"Well, I'm sure Steven had at least half." Because he didn't. I ate it all. By myself.)

 I am of course obviously excited to have my best friend, and my husband back home; but I'm even more excited for Ava's dad to be home. He'll be here to play with her, and teach her things, and read to her, and you know--do all that "dad" stuff.

Being a single mom (geographically speaking) has been a tough adventure. I have tremendous respect for women who take care of children on their own. Not because I can relate. I don't think I can entirely. Yes, I'm here with Ava alone, but I'm not balancing a job, or juggling finances. I'm not taking care of anyone besides her, and myself--and sometimes it's STILL difficult. Hence the respect.

But the experience has taught me a lot about independence. If I can handle a newborn baby for the first time, in a foreign country, without friends and family, (besides the new ones I've made of course!) with a husband in Afghanistan, of all places, I can probably handle most things, (maybe). Do I feel guilty for giving myself this "pat on the back?" NOPE!

Very soon we will be adjusting to "new normal" (thanks Keely Steger) yet again. Steven will return home to a baby, where there once was none. When he left it was just the two of us. Now he'll hit the ground running with three.

But it's alright. I don't complain. I don't feel like I need to. I love it here, and I've made a lot of friends who are more like family. The Army has been really good to us. And I'm so proud of Steven.

It will be strange/interesting/fun/scary/new/etc./etc./etc. I like to think that unchartered waters can be pretty exciting though.

And we will get to be a family;  so we've got that goin' for us--which is nice :).


  1. so happy he'll be "home" soon! I completely understand and sympathize with the spider thing (as you know) but I feel like you've stepped it up a notch with the fainting spell. I shouldn't tell you that I thought of the risk of the spider crawling on you while you were out. AGH! why did I say/think that?!?! but he didn't, obviously. bobby mentioned the other day that he might have to go away for a week this summer (alone) and the VERY FIRST thing I thought of was: "who will kill the spiders?!?!" what is wrong with us? I hate it, but I'm glad I'm not alone (sorry.)

  2. blayne, you have my utmost sympathy about the spider (i am the same way; i've never fainted but i have stood, pointed, and screamed until someone came to kill it). i'm also so excited for steven to be coming home. wes and i will keep praying for you guys the way we have been. i can't imagine wes being gone for so long and having abby by myself. i hope this doesn't sound weird, but i'm very proud of you and i think you're very tough when you need to be. you're an amazing woman =) i promise i'll post a new "baby bump" photo soon. i'm much bigger now than the pic on facebook. hopefully, i'll catch you on skype soon, too.

  3. ah, such a great post. you're a bonafide blogger, girl, and you should do it more often. :)
    and a shout-out!? yippee!!

  4. love your attitude, and so excited for you all to be reunited soon. woohoo royse family!!

  5. I used to feel the same way about spiders Blayne...I was utterly terrified of them in my younger years. I guess parenthood made me stand up to those little buggers and whack the ever lovin crap out of them cause I had to defend my little ones from their scary, evil, wrath. doesn't phase me in the least. .I just get the nearsest thong, magazine or flyswatter and whack away. I think your fears will eventulally subside about them one day.

  6. I'm so glad for you that Stephen will be home soon!

  7. Yay! So glad Stephen is coming home! I know that he will get in tons of hugs and kisses with Ava. :) And I know how you feel about spiders - I was bitten on the arm by a fiddleback when I was about 12 and had to take medication, get shots, etc...they were afraid part of the skin on my arm would "die" and I'd have a big crater in it from the bite! Hate, Hate, Hate spiders (did I mention that I HATE them!?). It's nice to have a hubby that is a good spider killer around for sure. He'll be home before you know it :)

  8. Thank you everyone--lol I am loving all the spider stories!

  9. OMG, I definitely had a tarantula encounter and I am ashamed to say I made Rene kill it. Hopefully this will not happen while he's deployed as I'm not sure what I will do! So glad Steven will be home soon, and best of luck with life as a new family!